With so many divorces happening in our culture, its not uncommon for children to wonder if divorce is going to attack their home. The wholesomeness of a great romance and friendship makes your kids feel safe and gives them confidence that their home will be stable and secure.
So, the question is, how can you secure a healthy marriage relationship, for you and your children?
- Spend time together: families need to prioritize their relationship in such a way that they make time for each other. Schedule a weekly family date and have "couch time" every day. Sit down with your spouse, your kids and talk about how their days went. The kids will see that you place top priority in your relationships with each other. Children feel secure when they see a team of dad, mom, and them....and they are all committed to each other.
- Show a united front with your kids: there are many decisions the two of you (husband and wife) will disagree on BUT never verbalize your frustrations, or disagreements in front of your children. Even if you are the one who gives in, you still win because as a team, you are both deciding to go the same direction.
- Lead your family in moral authority: When you look at your children and say, "this is the way I want us to live," is that same standard reflected in your own lives (as mom and dad)? Do your children see it lived in your relationship with each other?
When a husband loves and pursues his wife, a son learns what wholesome love looks like - and he will notice a glaring difference in what the world calls love and stability. When a daughter observes wholesome, romantic love at home, she's less likely to fall for a guy who tells her she's pretty and says he loves her, just so he can use her.
A solid, thriving marriage relationship builds a culture of trust and confidence that instills values into your children. They're more likely to receive your teaching, if they see the benefits in your own marriage. It also builds security in the hearts of young people and helps them make decisions not out of fear, but in response to the examples their parents show of a wholesome, thriving marriage and family.
Parents, let's respond to the call to create a culture in our homes that withstands the world.
Proverbs 22:6
Family Builders:
- What are some ways that you can show your children what a strong, secure marriage looks like?
- How many more practical things can you do to make family/relationship time important?
I really agree with this blog. BUT...What if you the wife are displaying the right way to live and the husband is not? I was married for over 10 years and our children only saw me going to church and living a life of Christ my husband wasn't. Our children have told me that don't want to get married because of what they have seen. I still try to encourage and promote the right things no matter what. But what can I say, they had me in a WOW moment.
ReplyDeleteHi there,
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your comment and understand that all remedies don't work, but real life happens.
You can only do what you can, what is right and acceptable unto God, and hope that your children see that and follow that path. Prayerfully, we hope that they do not dwell on the situation they/you faced as an example for living but really learn from the example that you have set for them. Obviously, you are only responsible for your actions, and no one else's...so you have done your part. The rest is up to God and He will show up on your behalf. Look at it this way, its building up their testimony, right!
Be strong and rest in God...
Yes, But I look bad as a parent to the girls. God has sent his WORD forth saying to marry another man. And I was obedient to the lord. After getting more than 3 confirmations, and this man is on drugs selling everything. I have been prayerful. Asking God why did he want me to leave a messed up maariage to go to a worst. God has told me all the outcomes. But I am getting ready to be homeless and I am diligent about looking for work and he off somewhere getting high. When he is tired he will come home and sleep for days. I Look Stupid to the children. I have no one to talk to, No one to help, And I have been thanking God for perserving us this far. But its alot to handle. I'm Sorry. I just vented.
ReplyDeleteDo you belong to a local church? Is there a pastor that you can turn & talk to?
ReplyDelete